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Love’s Supreme Desire Tabloid, July 2000
Love’s Supreme Desire Tabloid, in publication since 1995, is a free internet-based
monthly publication written by Blue Moor, AKA Bluebird/Clear Blue Easy. This
publication is enjoyable read by Agnes or Fred in Simpletext. Submissions
are welcome. Feel free to forward the tabloid to any interested parties.
Contact me for more information at bluemoor@earthlink.net.
FLASH: Tonight, Thursday August 3, is the television premiere of the first
episode of Show Show. It will be featured on the Queen Bee show on public
access channel 29 in San Francisco. The first episode was the creation of
Jim Jeske (who has sadly left the show and our lovely city for dumb old vampire-infested
New Orleans---just kidding, I love New Orleans!), Lars Micha, Blue Moor and
Mark Kliem, featuring Erick Dominguez (the new guy) and one line by Ponee.
We are currently in the process of working on our second of six planned episodes
of comedy sketches.
Oh hey, what’s up?
Wow, things are going so much better than last time I
wrote! The primary positive change is that I got a new job! I’m no longer
a Shift Supervisor at a goddamn Starbucks. I know, I know. What was I thinking?
But I did learn some things (which I’ve immediately forgotten) and got management
experience (enough to know that I don’t want to be in management). Can you
believe that I got my lazy, whoring, pot-smoking, late-night TV-watching
ass out of bed at 3:30 AM at least two days a week (often more) for almost
a year? It’s hard for me to believe that I put up with that job for as long
as I did. Ugggh, I felt like a robot there. I was so over it!
I finally decided to quit when it came time for me to
choose between road tripping out to the Rainbow Family of Living Light Gathering
(http://www.welcomehome.org/rainbow.html) in the big sky state of Montana
with several of the best friends for a week of transcendent magickal playtime,
or spend another week pumping out measured doses of caffeine for bitchy overworked
suburbanite stockbrokers for the benefit of a depersonalizing multinational
corporation with a Napoleon complex. I fully intended to be polite and give
Starbucks a two week notice, and had hoped to hear from a certain potential
employer, but they strung me along forever. Finally I had to decide whether
or not I was going on the trip, which would mean that I would have
to resign effective immediately and trust that the universe would provide
employment or cashola on the other side. And so I worked out my shift and
handed my letter of resignation to the other shift supervisor and asked him
to give it to my manager after I left. I didn’t want to deal with any drama
or false sentiment (considering that I didn’t much like my coworkers) over
the situation. I didn’t enjoy being there, I wanted to stop being there,
and so I left. I went home and screened my calls for the next few days. I
didn’t want to talk with my manager. I’m such a pussy. Like I said, I just
didn’t want to deal with anyone else’s drama.
We were to leave from Tree’s place at 4:20 PM and I was
running late. I had to pick up my HIV med fix at Statlander’s, go home, pick
up my luggage and get out to near 24th st BART in about twenty minutes. I
had to wait forever behind some old lady who was asking an eternity of hypochondriac
questions of an increasingly irritated pharmacy clerk. Finally I reached
the counter. She couldn’t find my meds. I had to ask another clerk, who was
more helpful and found them. I took off, got on the F-Market, then thought
to check my purchase and found one med missing. I got off the bus, ran back
and got back in line. I’d have to wait for them to fill the prescription.
I thought I might miss my ride to Montana. I got my meds and caught the F-Market,
wishing I’d gone underground because it’s faster. I try to call Tree a few
times from the street. No answer. I ran in the door of my apartment. I was
about to explode in a burst of pee. Owen was there being helpful but going
on about the Apple loan bill, like where was it because we need to pay it
and I’m like “I’m running late, I have to go now, I just paid all of the
other bills, you can pay that one!” Running out the door, kiss kiss, down
to the street, running out to the Hilton where I can catch a cab (a real
benefit of living in a neighborhood swarming with hotels). The cab gets stuck
in traffic. I’m being an asshole. Finally we get there. I ring the bell,
no answer. Then sweet Hummus yells to me from beside our rented Penske van.
Turns out I’m the second one there, of twelve people scheduled to cram their
shit into the back of a Penske van and trip out to Montana. When we’d finished
loading and shopping and schlepping and schmoking, it was 10:30 before we
got out of town. We drove all night, listening to music, philosophizing,
singing along. We stop to eat. Mostly it’s a blur. Then we’re in Montana.
It’s beautiful Big Hole Valley Montana, in the southwest bit of the state.
Mountains. Trees. Sage. And so began
a week of dancing to drums around the central fire “downtown,” watching
the sun rise, wearing no timepiece, my actions in tune with the timing of
my body, and the sun and moon, my water and my food and my shelter and my
shit (which, because I got a bug, flowed like the Ganges). I danced all day,
literally all day, beneath a collapsed hot air balloon with a brilliant rainbow
pattern. Our bodies and energies causing the balloon to lift, to shelter
in a dome above us, still, solid. Spirit. Drummers playing in ecstasy from
the bright multicolored morning into the lavender night. On the 4th of July,
laying about in the grass all day eating whatever food was brought within
our perimeter, laughing for hours and hours under Van Gogh skies. Love! Sex
(but not for me)! Intrigue! Adventure! Humility! Letting go! Getting lost
in the woods, coming across camp after camp of beautiful sweet members of
the Rainbow Family. I’ve never been in the company of a more incredible,
loving, trustworthy, responsible, crazy fun group of people. I can’t wait
to go to the Rainbow Gathering next year. Maybe I’ll see you there.
Faerie Freedom Village 2000: I am So happy to report that faerie freedom
village 2000 was a blast! The Radical Faeries even won an award from the
SF Pride Committee, among four other groups, as “Most Fabulous Showing of
Theme.” I think everyone had a good time, the Pride Committee loved us, the
spirit energy was way high, we were scandalous, it was a beautiful day! I
had so much fun working on it! Thank you all for coming and participating,
your fabulous faerie energy was adored by all and I think we really created
some magick. We had two days of performers onstage at United Nations Plaza,
plus the block-long grove of trees directly in front of the Federal Building
there which was fenced-off for our delicious glamorous community. I posted
a sign out front which read “Welcome to Faerie Freedom Village 2000. Breathe
Deep, you are about to enjoy the pleasure of a clothing-optional zone. Be
kind. You should eat some food. Namaste.” People who had never seen or heard
of the faeries strolled into our magickal space and many were clearly struck
and movedby undeniable faerie beauty and innocence.
Thank you Harry Hay for opening doors, Owen Edwards, Joey
Cain, ScooterPie, The Pride Committee (and everyone involved with putting
on such a gigantic spectacle and getting it to run smoothly), Jokie, Rory,
Phil, Marty Kahn, Sister Kitty, Sister Dana, Sister Roxanne, Sister Zsa Zsa,
and all the other sassy Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, The fabulous faeries
of Santa Cruz (for designing and schlepping gigantic glitter magick mushrooms---I
have the dick-head shaped cap in my living room, and I gave another one away
to a little boy named Owen who wants to learn how to spin yarn, and his mother
Kim, who gave us chips and salsa and got us stoned as the last tent came
down. Mellow/saucy Tree of Santa Cruz, a set painter, created a genetically
engineered dalmation/dragonfly that someone named Matilda---which is hanging
in our living room, Wolfie for her powerful words and inspiration in the
opening and closing rituals, Tree and all the other dancers, Stephanie, Jeremy,
Scott, Tanya and Stuart of Yogasexual Evolutionary Liberation Party, Jamez
Smith, Sparrow 13 (Sister Bloodstain), Racer Lupine, Haia the Venusian, Garrin
Benfield, Michael Rodriguez, Jallen Rix, and Diane Maldaver of Eighth Note
Records, Mark Mardon of the Bay Area Reporter, Andres Asador of Infinite
Chaos Spin Jam, David of Minneapolis, Timothy Buttercup, Logos, Lotus, Candi
Dish, Buckwheat, The fabulous and FIERCE Nico (does anyone know how to get
ahold of him? I want him to sing next year!), Jerry the Faerie, Nuggets,
Tree of Santa Cruz, (forgive me if I left anyone out) and all those who pitched
in and helped out in good old fashioned faerie fashion. They want us to come
back next year, and the year after that, and the year after that :)
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Wrote this letter to my sister: Hey Sandy, thanks for writing, nice to hear
from you. I've done jury duty before and it was both interesting and at times
extremely dull. It's interesting if you get an interesting case, but it's
boring because you sit around a lot. Everything is good here, I'm
enjoying my new job (at the front desk of the King George Hotel---www.kinggeorge.com)
a lot. I often thought it might be fun working with tourists because the
city is all fresh and new to them and I get to turn them on to all kinds
of cool things in the city, having been here for 8 years (I can't believe
it's been 8 years! Time flies when you're having fun). Our hotel is located
right on Union Square, the high-class theater and shopping district just
a 7 minute walk from my place. The money is better and I like the people.
It's a small-scale operation, not a huge corporation like Starbucks, which
I like so much better! I guess I had to work at a place like that in order
to learn that it really does make a difference. Plus I get perks like tips,
commissions, free tickets to shows, even free meals. Anyway, it's nice to
not have to bitch about work anymore, or to get up at 3:30 in the morning
unless the house is burning down. I'm more likely to go to sleep at 3:30
than to wake up at that hour, so I don't know how or why I put up with that
shit for as long as I did. Plus, my schedule is much more flexible here.
We're fully staffed and since we're a travel-related industry, the management
is totally supportive of our taking time off and traveling, which is something
that I intend to do more often. So it really feels like the right job for
me for the time being. The LookSmart job would have been more money and so
on but maybe this is a blessing in disguise. I like working with the general
public and I'd miss that in an office.
Owen and I have been getting along well. We've been talking
lately of either buying a house in Oakland/Berkeley or buying some land we
heard about on Short Mountain, Tennessee, which would be a big change for
me but it may be really wonderful. We'd have a communal living situation,
artist/spiritual retreat, and day spa B&B, among other things like farming
and yarn spinning and writing, painting, all that. It could be fabulous!
It's hard for me to wrap my mind around leaving San Francisco, though, because
it's been such a dear friend to me most of the time, and I have such roots
here. Still, I like to be open to whatever may come along that may be best
for my long term happiness. I'm just trying to figure out which road to take
right now. I haven't signed up for classes yet, but I'm thinking of taking
painting classes as well, or certainly just start painting more often. Last
weekend I stayed up all night painting with my friend Stephanie and it was
so much fun and felt so right. More like that, please. Last night Owen and
I went and picked up a ribbon we won for putting on an event called Faerie
Freedom Village 2000. at the SF 2000 Pride Parade. Among five others, we
won "Most fabulous showing of theme." We're very psyched and proud about
it and plan on doing more with it next year, if we're still in town. This
year we had a performance stage with lots of great musicians, DJs, some spoken
word, plus a fenced-off chill out area under the trees where hundreds of
people relaxed, made art, hung out. It was wonderful. The award cocktail
party was fun, we ended up closing a local pub with some of our friends.
I don't drink a lot but it sure is fun sometimes to kick your heels up. I'm
planning on road tripping up to Wolf Creek, Oregon for a gathering with my
friend Marty from 8/15-18, looking forward to that, and I may do a trip to
Tennessee in the Fall. Talk to you later, much love, Blue
PS, I want to thank you all for being there for me and for each other during
dad's illness and death. I'm so proud of all of you. Mary and Karen, special
thanks for doing so much work on dad's estate, and for helping me get my
share of it when I really needed it. It's nice having that cushion there.
I'll talk to you later, give all your kiddies a big hug from me. Love, Blue
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POEM IN PRAISE OF MY LOVER PAN
IF PAN WOULD
COME &COME
& COME
AND DRINK WITH
ME SOME
CUBAN RUM
THEN
I SO
QUICK
WOULD SEIZE
HIS PRICK
AND
WITH SOME
LUCK---PAN’S
HORNY HERD
WOULD
SURELY FUCK!
---By Haia Ted Berk, written sometime in the past
FLASH! From out of Haia The Venusian’s 60’s secret life (written by Haia):
From October 4th to November 12, at the Whitney
Museum of American Art, Madison Ave. and 75th Street, NYC there will be a
program of films, videos and projected environments by (Haia’s longtime friend)
Jud Yalkut, which (according to the most recent Whitney Museum bulletin)
“examine some of the most important experiments in 60’s cinematic psychedelia.”
When our band, “Citizens for Interplanetary Activities,” went back to NYC
to play with Procol Harum and Simon and Garfunkel at Fillmore East in 1967,
Jud Yalkut had just finished editing his film “Self-Obliteration.” Our band
was asked by Jud to do the soundtrack for the film (I was billed as the Lead
Venusian Poet of Citizens for Interplanetary Activities) so my poetry and
narration with Win Hardy’s guitar work and the band will be projected (along
with the other films and videos by Jud Yalkut) from 9-5 at the Whitney. All
Praise to Mishka, my cat familiar.
(Editor’s note: This exhibit will coincide with a showing of the work of
photographers Edward Steichen as well as Lisa Law, who took a picture
of me, Blue, while I was on the Global Peace Walk 1995 in Taos, New Mexico
within days of my vision experience in a sweat lodge, which I have described
in the Tabloid. For more info on this exhibit, please see www.whitney.org.)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(from Samuel Garvin): Alchemic alembics crowd the brainscene, synapses rewired
from Bohr atom models hung from cheap twine in antiseptic laboratories, in
which a still is working on the latest byproduct of human endorphin and gin
berries. The Mad Herr Doktor cackles in the grey matter of The Subject as
he ruminates the Copenhagen Universe within anesthetized
daymares of medical examinations- every three minutes a fat nurse comes to
inject him with some neuroleptic braintease from which he is sent to Institutes
of Higher Consciousness to explain the codes of Through The Looking Glass
teager math students from other galaxies, absorbing and assimilating his
human biorhythms into their own and for all he knows some
of them may be walking amongst the terrestrials right now as he instructs
them on how to Cabalistically control primates with the keys of their own
superstitions. There is no watermark for discerning how long he's been on
the Institute Circuit, how long the probes have fried his reality meter,
the last thing he was aware of was watching the Manchurian Candidate on VHS
in his trailerhome in Kansas with the Sagrado Corazon de Jesus candle burning
on the stereo cabinet over a litter of juggie mags, with his TV dinner buzzing
arm's length away in microwave. Who were the shadowy figures who came between
him and Sinatra's sleepwalking on the vid? Muffled barkings of Trixy's labrador
nextdoor accompany his memory of the first fatal injection. To Be Continued
(or not)
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Upcoming events, internet links and contacts:
Read some about my friend Haia the Venusian at http://www.links.net/vita/sf/haia/
Check out SHOW SHOW, a comedy skit series written, directed by and starring
Jim Jeske, Lars Micha, and me, Blue Moor, produced by Mark Kliem of the fabulous
Lavender Lounge Studios: http://www.lavenderlounge.com/showshow.html (this
is a racy web site).
Find out more about hot new rising musician and extra-super nice guy Garrin
Benfield at his webpage: http://www.garrin.com/index.html. Upcoming shows:
8/9-Bazaar Cafe, SF, (with spoken word by Haia), 8/13- Hotel Utah, SF (with
spoken word by Haia), 8/17-Jahva House, Oakland, 8/24-19 Broadway, Fairfax
CA.
Hey, this comedy skit called “The Kraft Mystery Kidsfeaturing Nuggett, the
Crime-solving cat with ESP. I cowrote with my friend lars Micha is now playing
at the link below. This sketch is part of the first episode of SHOW SHOW.
We are currently working on the second episode. Hope you like it. Later,
Blue
http://www.villagetv.com/.
The link is currently at the top of their homepage.
For information about the Summer 2000 gathering at Wolf Creek, OR check out
this link: http://www.IamMagic.com/Gathering2000.html
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PS: Regarding moving to Tennessee, I need more information. It’s all just
a big question mark for me right now. I love San Francisco, I love my friends
and my life here (except for the high rent) and I’m in no big hurry. Show
Show is just starting to roll and I love doing that and want to see where
it goes. I just started a new job that I enjoy. Owen and I are planning on
going out to Short Mountain for the Fall gathering, so I’ll learn more about
what it’s like out there, in addition to seeing some friends I made at the
Rainbow Gathering. Owen has been there before and really wants this to happen
and wants to live in the country, but I’m not convinced, and need to know
more before I make a change and a commitment of this magnitude. Namaste,
Blue